ZELENSKI, elisabeth isabella

[elle zelenski]

elisabeth isabella zelenski ,

nineteen , citizen , analytical .[/center]

I SWEAR I'VE SEEN YOU BEFORE. REMIND ME, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

------ elisabeth isabella zelenski. i go by elle, though. i do not really like elisabeth all that much. i mean, it is pretty, i guess. just really... normal. not that i have a problem with normal. it is just that, when you have a name like ‘elisabeth,’ you get confused with other people frequently. and then when people talk about you, they have to distinguish you from all the other people with the same name. so i would not just be elisabeth, i would be elisabeth z. i am pretty sure it is less complicated to be elle. it is a less common name, and i won’t get confused with other people.

my middle name is less standard. it is pretty, but i would never just go by isabella. i don’t think it fits me as well as elle does. but that could just be because i am so used to going by the latter.

i think zelenski is pretty unique. i mean, i had this friend in chicago before we moved to pittsburgh three years ago, and her last name was smith. and she would always be asked if she was related to so-and-so, because so many people have that last name. i am only asked in reference to my sister. i have never met anyone outside of my family with the same last name. but i do get asked if i am alexandra zelenski’s sister a lot. which i am.

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YOU'VE GOT ME WONDERING. HOW MANY CANDLES DID YOU BLOW OUT ON YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY CAKE?

------ nineteen. my birthday is august thirteenth, 1990. i do not really look nineteen, though. see, i look a little younger than i am, and my sister looks older than she is, so people always think that she is my older sister. it stinks. i am far more mature than she is, and i mean, it doesn’t matter all that much. it just gets a little annoying sometimes, as i am sure you can imagine.

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YOU LOOK FAMILIAR. HAVE I SEEN YOU AROUND SCHOOL AT ALL?

------ i graduated from stewart academy this past june. i wouldn’t say i liked it, really, but i did not mind it. i was always the good kid. did all my homework on time, studied, didn’t break rules. i’m very used to order. but i am taking a year off before college, and i really do not know what i am going to do with myself. i will be going to the university of pittsburgh next year. i do not know what i am going to major in yet, but how many people know beforehand? that’s stupid, actually. that is just what the guidance counselors tell you to make you feel better about being undecided. but all of my friends who are starting college this year know what they are going to do. i do not. it is really stressing me out, but i suppose i have a year to try and decide.

i am actually rather worried about what i am going to do with this next year. i feel like my brain is going to fry if i don’t do something intellectual, so i might take a class or two at the community college, just to keep myself from getting more stupid. i will probably just stay around pittsburgh and work. i don’t know what else i would do.

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I HAVE A PRYING QUESTION. WHAT ARE YOU MORE INTO, GALS OR GUYS?

------ oh, guys, please. though, i am not nearly as guy-oriented as my sister. unlike many girls, men are not the epicenter of my universe. alexi is very into guys, though. i just do not focus on it. i have never had a boyfriend. it is not that i don’t want one. i just have other things to think about, so i do not go out of my way to impress them. i have never put as much effort into my appearance into my appearance as most girls do. alexi primps for a ridiculous amount of time each and every morning. my morning routine is basically showering, putting my hair in a ponytail and brushing my teeth. i think that my teeth may be my prettiest feature. is that odd?

NOW ON TO THE FUN STUFF. GOT ANY HOBBIES OR PASTIMES?

------ i do not really like reading, but i do it all the time. for school, i mean. gosh, i keep messing that up. i am not in school any more. gosh, is that hard to get used to. well, when i was in high school i studied copiously, and i am sure i will do the same in college. but i’m taking a gap year, so i guess i get a year off from that.

i guess i do not really have many hobbies. i am not at all musically inclined. i have never been very into sports. i suppose studying would be my biggest hobby; isn’t that pathetic. but i sincerely can not think of anything else... i mean, i like to cook, but i wouldn’t really call it a hobby. my dad can’t cook, and i got tired of ordering out all the time, so i started cooking dinner for the family when i was twelve. it was more a necessity than a hobby. and taking care of alexa always took up most of my time, but that is not really a hobby, either. i like taking photographs, but i am not very good at it. that might count as a hobby. i go for runs all the time, but that is mainly because i do not plays sports and would prefer to not have to diet religiously.

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NOW, TELL ME ALL ABOUT WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY. WHAT DO YOU LIKE?

------ people-watching, cooking, studying, succeeding, science, school, lemonade, organization, good grades, puppies, kool-aid, alexa, ice cream, running, color-coding, movies, taking pictures, accents, traveling, hopscotch, sidewalk chalk, math, talking about other people (i do not mean like, gossiping. just for the record), english, writing essays, the english language, good grammar, cool-sounding words, thinking, philosophy, proof, reason, knowledge, typewriters, the smell of old books, dandelions, dancing, old-school sunday morning cartoons, walking up early, nail polish, the smell of nail polish remover, the environment, darkness, being given direction, crayons, colored pencils, black-and-white photographs, silly scissors, kaleidoscopes, rain, the sound of people laughing, headbands, flip flops, jeans, sneakers, necklaces, carpets, cleaning, the smell of pine-sol, putting on clothing right out of the dryer, sunlight, diners, cities, bicycles, apartment buildings, vhs tapes.

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WHAT ABOUT THE STUFF THAT DOESN'T. WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE?

------ cats, attention, drugs, talking in front of large groups of people, loud parties, loud music, reading, history, summer, heat, limeade, alcohol, dieting, group sports, physical education, music education, being in pictures, spicy food, tripping, religion, being labeled, talking about myself, people who overuse the word “like,” people who barely speak english, contractions, blind faith, red cars, forgetting things, hypocrisy, bugs, being compared to alexa, roses, poetry, eggs, how i look in sunglasses, meat, sleeping in, wasting the day, not getting enough sleep, painting my nails (i usually just put on a color, let it chip off, then do a new one), using nail polish remover (it stings!), soda, markers, horror movies, vagueness, ponytails, snow, summer, toe rings, rings (i just lose them), heels, dresses, skirts, make-up, hardwood floors, fancy restaurants.

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I KNOW THIS IS HARD, BUT WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN TEN YEARS?

------ in ten years? hopefully out of college and grad school. i will probably go to graduate school for something sciencey – i do not know what i want to do with my life yet, but i figure it will be something in the science realm. maybe i will be a doctor; i do not know. i guess that is another goal – i want to decide on what i want to do with my life, and do whatever that is and well. and i want to get a good job doing something i really like doing.

in ten years, i will be twenty-nine. and i think by then, i would want to be married. i know that that is something i want to do. maybe not now, but i do really want to get married at some point. i want to have a family, too. i know that that is really overdone. but my mom and dad were so happy together. as far as i can remember, they were perfect for each other. my dad still gets this dreamy look when he talks about her. i want that. i want to fall in love, really in love. i want to connect with another person on that level.

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TELL ME ALL ABOUT THE STUFF THAT GETS YOU SCARED OR ANNOYED, I'D REALLY LIKE TO KNOW.

------ well, for the sake of organization, let us split this up:

FEARS

i am not afraid of too many clichéd things, like heights or the dark. i actually love the dark, and i have never minded heights like alexi does. i am terribly afraid of bugs, though. they are just very, very creepy. even butterflies. i mean, they are pretty from a distance. but up close? it reminds of some horror movie that i can’t remember the name of... the people turn into insects! gosh, what was that movie? that is going to bug me.

anyway. i am also afraid of... not making a difference. i saw this episode of house, and this old guys was dying, but he refused any treatment because he wanted cameron to remember him. he did not have any family or friends, and his reasoning was that if he died easily, he would be just another patient. but if he suffered, she would remember him; she would be the only one to remember him. i thought that that was really sad. i am kind of the same way. i want the fact that i existed to impact someone, somehow. i want to mean something or do something, be remember by someone. otherwise, what is the point of living?

i think everyone is at least marginally afraid of death, and i am no exception. i do not believe in the afterlife or heaven or hell, and i think that makes it scarier. because what is after death? is there such a thing as the soul? if there is, where does that go, what happens to it? and if not, if you just... end... i can’t even comprehend that, just ceasing to exist. i like things that i can understand, and the uncertainty of death terrifies me.

ANNOYANCES

i do not like contractions, and i try to avoid using them. it doesn’t always work out that way – see, i just used one. they just bug me, and i try to avoid them as a general rule. i hate how we as a generation (or a few) have unquestionably murdered the english language. i think i was born in the wrong century, because i would much prefer to live in seventeenth or eighteenth century england, when people actually had a comprehensive grasp of their native language and a vocabulary far more expansive than most modern people’s. i hate people who say “like” every five seconds. i use it to, so i am not calling myself totally blameless. but, as with the contractions, i do try to avoid using “like” when it is not as a comparison of two things.

i do not like talking about myself. i much prefer talking about other people. i find people fascinating, and i can not understand them at all. i like asking people about themselves, but i hate when it comes back around to me.

i am against religion. you could call me an atheist. i know that most people hold very different beliefs, and i am not the type to attack them with my opinion or convince them that they are wrong, so i keep my beliefs to myself. though i suppose it is no secret that i am a rather analytical person. i think things out. i calculate and analyze. i think out everything i say before i say it. and i can not believe in anything without proof. there is no proof that there is a god or any almighty-being, and logically, it makes no sense. i put everything in very scientific terms, so the idea of a god seems preposterous to me. you are welcome to your own beliefs, but those are mine.

i try not to share that too often, because i do not want to offend anyone. but when i do, i hate people who judge me for it. i do not judge people for believing in something with no physical evidence when all logic would tell them otherwise. so do not judge me for actually thinking things out. i’m also rather annoyed by religious zealots. i am not normally like this, so take this anecdote with a grain of salt: someone stopped by our chicago apartment once, giving out pamphlets for some religion or another, and basically telling me that i would rot in hell if i did not follow his line of thought. so i innocently asked, “what hell?” he did not like that very much. he said something extraordinarily clever, like “the one you’re going to burn in!” i laughed and closed the door. it was actually rather fun.

SINCE WE'RE GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER SO WELL, TELL ME ABOUT YOUR PARENTS.

------ my mother died when i was eleven, eight years ago. she was forty-three, so she would be fifty-one now. her name was christina marie jaszczak zelenski. she was a casting director for wb. she ran auditions for movies and decided who played what part. i remember thinking she had the coolest job; i still do. she was sick for a while, since i was eight. she was not diagnosed until after she died, but she died of wilson’s disease. after they figured that out, alexi and i both had to get tested for it; i guess it is genetic. neither of us have it.

my father, blake maurice zelenski, is fifty-three years old. he owns a diner back home in chicago. it’s actually a pretty popular diner. i have lived there with him and alexi my whole life, until three years ago, when he started the two of us at stewart. i miss him, and alexia and i do spend the summers with him in chicago.

ARE THERE ANY OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS CLOSE TO YOU, LIKE SIBLINGS?

------ i have a younger sister, alexandra genevieve zelenski. she is only four years younger than me, but she acts a bit younger than that. if we are talking maturity levels, i could be her mother. i basically am, really. when our mom died, we were both pretty young. but i was old enough that i could take care of myself. alexi never really had a mother figure. i mean, our mom wasn’t much of a motherly figure in the two years before she died, and alexi was only five when mom got sick. and my dad wasn’t really cut out to be a single father. do not get me wrong, i love him to death. he is a fantastic person, and if he had had a wife to do most of the practical things, i am sure he would have been a terrific father. but he didn’t know how to braid hair. he couldn’t help me when i got my period for the first time or when i started high school. i went through everything before alexi did, and i helped her when she got there.

i have been told that i am very protective of my sister, and i guess i can be. i do everything for her. i am always there for her. and i got so into that motherly role that i think i started acting that way with other people, too. i look out for all of my friends like i do for my sister. and that is how i like it. i like taking care of people, making sure that they are happy. some of my friends have told me that i need to pay more attention to myself, but i disagree. alexi might take advantage of it a little, but if she does, it would be my fault. i practically raised her, after all.

i would never complain about that, either. but i never really got to be a kid. i think that influenced my decision to take a year off before college, though there were also the financial and practical reasons. i am staying in pittsburgh to watch over her, though. we have never been apart. we didn’t start at stewart until she was old enough to go, too. and when i do go to college next year, we will still be in the same city, and close enough to get together or whatever. i am still going to work and share my earnings with my sister. i am still going to visit her at school. i will still help her with her school work and make sure she studies. i’ll do her hair or nails or whatever else she needs. but until this year, we were roommates every year, whether at school or home. i just need to know what it would be like to be on my own, because we will not always be together. i can not take care of her forever.

now, alexi is my best friend. she is amazing, really. i will always be there for her. but it can be hard to have her for a sister, especially when i have to be so responsible for her. she likes having things her way. maybe she is just used to it, because my father and i have always done everything for her. and, well, if you’ve seen her, you’ll understand the next bit. my sister is absolutely gorgeous. guys pay her an awful lot of attention, which can be worrisome on the motherly level. but on the sister level? i get a little jealous of her sometimes. she is three years younger than me, but when she was a freshman, she was dating juniors – kids in my grade – and seniors. my guy friends in chicago always wanted to come hang out at my place so they could flirt with her. in stewart, we shared a dorm, and my male friends would stop be to say hello to her. she has dated guys that i liked. not intentionally, of course – i never told her that i liked them. i just let her have them. i mean, in most cases, it was not like i had a chance with the guy anyway. i am more average-looking. plain, really. and as i have said, i was not as into the dating scene as she was. it was never that big of a deal. i am not saying that i resent her, because i do not. it is just a bit odd, having your younger sister dating not only your friends and guys your age, but guys older. and she is far more experienced in the dating department than i am. and whenever we go out together, every guy around stares at her. no one ever stares at me like that. which is fine. it just can make me feel a bit badly about my appearance sometimes, walking around with alexi.

by the way, only i can call her alexi. you can call her alex or alexa, but i am the only one who can call her alexi.

WHAT ABOUT PETS? DO YOU HAVE ANY OF THOSE?

------ no, i do not. we had a dog back in chicago for a while, a cocker spaniel named charlie. then he bit the mail man and was put to sleep. before that, my mom had a golden retriever named lassie. my dad gave her away when mom died. i also had a hamster at some point, when alexi was an infant. it ran away, got stuck in the basement and died. i suppose you could say that we do not have the best luck with pets.

ARE YOU FROM AROUND HERE? I CAN'T RECALL YOU SAYING SO.

------ no, i was born and raised in chicago, though i think i mentioned that once or twice. we lived in an apartment in the middle of the city, above my dad’s diner. i love it there. three years ago – after years of saving, mind you – my father sent alexi and i to pittsburgh to attend stewart academy. alexi is still there, but i just graduated.

for the next year, i will be renting an apartment in the area that is, more or less, the slums of pittsburgh. i do not know what else you could expect of high school grad working two jobs, at the library and the beanery – the local coffee shop.

NOW THAT WE'RE DONE HERE, IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU WOULD LIKE TO SAY?

------ oh, well, i think i did a pretty thorough job, don’t you? and i have really had enough inner reflection for one day, thanks.

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oh hey there! my name is andi and i've been roleplaying
for hell if i know amount of years. i'm seventeen years old. yeah, i
know. i've been around the block a few times. i like using lucy hale as
a play by. she’s pretty hot, yeah? if you'd like to contact me, you can do
so through pm. i gotta have my red light district. and now, i'll let you check out my skills. i'm pretty fly.

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Audrey smirked at herself in the mirror before walking out of her room, slamming the door behind her, and clomping down the stairs in her pointy tie-up black heels. She strutted into the kitchen and posed, one hand on her hip and the other limp at her side. Her father sat at the dining room table, eating a quick bowl of cereal as he read the morning’s New York Times. She paused there in front of him, waiting for him to take notice of her arrival, to look up, or grunt, or something.

This was exactly what she expected. It was like this every morning; her father scarfing down a quick breakfast and reading the paper before slipping off silently, her mother showering and casually using up all of the warm water. They didn’t pay her much attention, especially not in the mornings. So now she was pushing her limits, wondering just how outragesouly she could act before her parents took notice. Apparently, the bar was set high.

She cleared her throat, running a hand through her long red locks. Nothing. She frowned. “Morning,” she greeted him, waiting for him to look up. He didn’t. He grunted some sort of reply and nodded his head without removing his eyes from his paper or slowing the incredible rate at which he was eating his cereal.

Most parents would have taken notice and sent their daughter back to her room. But no. “I’m going shopping,” she added, but still no response. Audrey scowled. She was standing in front of her father in three-inch heels, a lace black bra with enough underwire to make her Bs look like Cs, and matching lace boy-shorts underwear, complete with a fake dragon tattoo on her exposed stomach, her black and white pearl choker, and her white stackable bangles. She looked like she was about to star in a porno, quite frankly. And her father sat at the table before her, taking no notice.

“Just kidding. I’m actually going to go post nude photographs of myself online,” she amended. Gregory nodded absently, muttering something that sounded like ’have fun.’ “Asshole,” Audrey murmured under her breath as she stomped back upstairs, more out of anger this time than trying to call attention to herself. And still, she elicited no response.

Audrey marched into her room, again slamming the door behind her. Grumbling all the while, she pulled on a short white skirt over her underwear and a black top, leaving on her shoes, necklace, and bangles. Then she grabbed her silver purse, deciding that she needed to get the hell out of her house. So for once that summer, she beat her father out of their large mansion of a house, but found that her car was blocked into the driveway by his. “Fucking cunt,”

[/color] she cursed under her breath, leaning against her car and waiting for her father to finish his breakfast and lug his lazy ass out to his car.

She hated her parents, but Audrey had always felt a greater disdain towards her father. Her mother had a few redeeming qualities – she had a job Audrey rather admired, even if it was nothing she would ever want to do, and she had a terrific fashion sense (Audrey had to have gotten it from somewhere, after all). Gregory was just a jackass and an unobservant prick. But lately, her mother had been the one getting on her nerves. She’d been growing more and more forgetful, and more and more prone to random angry fits than every. Annabeth had always been temperamental, but it was just getting ridiculous.

So she needed out of her house like she had never needed anything before. But there was no where for her to go, now that she stood outside her BMW convertible and weighed her options. But her mother had stopped going food shopping, and her father was too blind to realize that they needed food. So she would go and get food, but not for them. No, Audrey would just go and get she liked, and just enough to stock the mini fridge in her room. They could deal for themselves. After all, they were the adults, weren’t they?

Audrey sighed, crossing her arms over her chest. It seemed her father was, for once in his sorry life, taking his sweet time with breakfast. And what impeccable timing; the one time she was waiting on him, he moved a mile an hour. She pulled the keys to her car from her silver handbag and pushed the button that unlocked her door. Sitting in the firm leather seat, Audrey started the car and turned on the radio, blasting it loudly enough that she was sure her feather could hear it from inside. That is, if he was listening. Then she leaned her head back against the headrest and waited.

When it came to relationships, there were many aspects that scared Audrey and turned her completely off of the archaic ritual. She was afraid of being objectified, of being some buy’s accessory. She was afraid of forfeiting the control she asserted over every make-out of sex partner she had ever had. She was afraid of making it so easy for one person to hurt her.

But Audrey had one main fear, greater than all the other; one she would never admit, and barely registered herself. She was tough, braver than she gave herself credit for. If everything listed above had been the sum of all of her fears, she might have taken the gamble and put her feelings and he self-esteem on the line; that is, of course, if she found someone worth the potential pain. But she wouldn’t now, not ever. The main reason behind her fear of relationships came from watching her parents. She didn’t want to end up like them, so consumed in their unhealthy relationship that it affected every thing they did and every decision they made. She didn’t want to let anyone dominate her whole world like that, control every aspect of ber being. She didn’t want to fight through the day in anticipation of the sex. She didn’t want to be so blinded that she could make her own daughter hate her like she hated her parents.

Speaking of which; three songs later, Gregory ambled out the front door and to his car. He took no notice of his daughter glaring at him from her seat in her car. He backed out of the drive way teasingly slowly. Audrey raced and was down the road in the time it had taken her father to start the car.

The only question that remained was where she was headed, and she didn’t have the vaguest idea. She drove a few minutes in the direction of down town, wondering where she should go to get some things to stock in her fridge. Of course; Shop n’ Save. She parked effortlessly in the parking lot moments after the thought occurred to her, wondering how it could have possibly taken her so long to dream up. Then she climbed out of the car, locked it, and walked into the store, grabbing a basket as she entered.

Audrey wandered up and down the aisles, looking for anything that appealed to her. And quickly, she realized that the adage was true; never shop hungry. Her basket was overflowing, and she had only been in the store a matter of mere minutes. She hesitated outside the cereal aisle, wondering if she dared to enter. She was a cereal buff, and knew that if she walked in, she would exit with more boxes of cereal than she could hope to carry. And today, she didn’t have daddy’s credit card. Whenever she got into a fight with her parents or they hit her, she would quickly be given her father’s credit card. Then, as revenge, she would buy expensive clothing and jewlery she didn’t need and treat her friends to meals. And her father got angry, but didn’t do anything or say anything about it.

Yesterday, however, had been a quiet evening. She had gotten home late, and her parents had already moved on to the ‘rough sex’ portion of the evening. She had gone to bed, blasting her stereo loud enough for the neighbors to hear and dance to, and gone to bed. Then she had woken up and found her father at the breakfast table. So she only had her own credit card, which had a daily limit of one hundred and fifty dollars. That shouldn’t be an issue for a snack run, but if she wanted to go shopping later, she would have to keep her food expenses to a minimum.

So she started to walk past the cereal aisle and put it from her mind when she noticed a familiar boy walking down the aisle, swinging a basket identical to the one she held dangling at her side in her left hand. That was when she realized she should have gotten a cart; there was no place for her bag, which was slung over her other shoulder. She was starting to feel lopsided as more and more junk collected in her basket. The boy took two boxes of cereal and put them in his basket before continuing down the aisle.

Audrey wanted to sneak after him, but her heels were too loud. The sharp points clanged against the tiled floor with every step, announcing her presence. So instead, she scurried to the next aisle and speed-walked down it, planning on beating him to the end of the aisle and surprising him. He would turn and start up the next aisle, only to run head-on into his favorite red head. At least, she assumed that she was Adam’s favorite red head. It wasn’t like he had very many to choose from.

She skidded to a halt at the end of the aisle, a grin lighting up her freckled features as she stood, waiting for Adam. Then she realized that she was standing next to a display of gummi products. Without thinking, she grabbed a box of gushers and tossed it into her already overflowing basket, then turned towards where Adam would be coming from and commenced waiting.
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TAG alyssaaaa! (adam)
LYRICS this providence by my beautiful rescue
OUTFIT one thousand seven hundred and five words.
OUTFIT clickie here
CHARACTER audrey jenna louise patton
NOTES YOUR FACE?!
CREDIT sophielizabeth of CAUTION 2.0.

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